The Spiritually F*cked Podcast!

“So I actually didn’t go to India…” 
After a two month hiatus, Taylor shares where she’s been, the intentions behind it and why she never actually made it to India. (she really did try though!!)
Let this episode be a silent return to yourself… (cough cough #silence), and an opportunity to land back into presence. 
We talk about the power behind intention, the truth about bridging trust with yourself and the depth that happens when you reconnect with your spirit team. Taylor also shares what’s coming to the surface in her next ‘soul coming.’
If you’ve been looking for a podcast during those “trust fall” seasons… let this be the episode for you.
Hopefully you didn’t unfollow us during the silence… and if you’re still here, thank you. We’re so happy to have you.
Welcome back to Spiritually F*cked. 
We adore you.
xx, 
Taylor
 
~
 
podcast links 
 
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-spiritually-f-cked-podcast/id1829193477
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me -
https://www.sadflowerswritten.com/workwithme/p/basic-service-99c7l-3lnmr-tt4w3
 

Here is a snippet from Taylor's - unleash your inner muse - workshop where we explore "we're all just a mirror medicine" — the idea that what we encounter in others is reflecting something within ourselves, inviting deeper awareness rather than judgment.
We also unpack why “letting go” is so often misunderstood, and how it can become a form of spiritual bypassing when it’s used to avoid feeling, processing, or being with what’s actually present.
This episode explores:
The low down on the workshop itself
Why triggers are invitations, not obstacles
How reflection becomes medicine when met with honesty
The difference between true release and emotional avoidance
What it means to alchemize emotion instead of transcending it
If you’ve been trying to heal by overriding your feelings or rushing toward detachment, this conversation offers a more embodied, compassionate path back to yourself.
We adore you, muse.
;)
 
For the full workshop: https://sadflowerswritten.com/products/unleash-your-inner-muse-%E2%9C%A8
~
 
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-spiritually-f-cked-podcast/id1829193477
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships

A good day for astrology hey?
What If the Most Spiritual Thing You Could Do… Is Stop Trying to Look Spiritual at All?
In this epi, I sit down with Ben Duffy for a raw, expansive, and surprisingly obviously hilarious conversation about authenticity, ego, emptiness, pain, devotion — and what it actually means to come home to yourself.
What starts as a trippy synchronicity (same birthday, same year, eerily similar charts, and almost the same podcast name) opens into a deep exploration of dark nights of the soul, lineage healing, embodiment, and why humor might be one of the most sacred tools we have. (cough cough... it is)
We talk about performative spirituality, rigid identities, and the quiet violence of constantly trying to fix yourself. About grief, devotion, heartbreak, art — and the freedom that comes when you stop abandoning yourself in the name of “healing.”
This episode is a love letter to your expression.To feeling instead of performing.To staying loyal to yourself — even when it’s messy.
A reflection on devotion, heartbreak, art, and the freedom that comes when you stop abandoning yourself in the name of healing.
We Explore:
Performative spirituality vs. lived truth
Emptiness, non-duality, and the freedom of groundlessness
Dark nights of the soul, depression, and surrender
Grief, pain, and the alchemy that turns heartbreak into art
Ego, shadow, and integration over “ego death”
Embodiment, feminine lineage healing, and the body as teacher
Devotion, ritual, prayer, humor — and not taking life so seriously
Integrity, right livelihood, and choosing a soul-aligned life
WE ADORE YOU FAM!!!
For more Ben: 
instagram: duffdaddy100 & spiritualfxckboy
spotifty: spiritualyfxckboy 
https://benjamenduffy.com/
 
~
 
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-spiritually-f-cked-podcast/id1829193477
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships

Roast anyone???
This episode is a live chart read (or live roast) of Taylor’s astrology chart. What starts as a honest self-examination (drag lol) turns into real-time interpretation, intuitive hits, and pattern recognition that feels a little too accurate. It moves between humor and depth, offering a candid look at how an astrology chart actually reads when you stop being polite about it.
If you’ve ever felt personally victimized by astrology — or curious about what your own chart might reveal — you’ll probably recognize something here.
WE ADORE YOU!! And all your placements... ;)
 
To book an intuitive reading - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-astrology-sessions or email sadflowerswritten@gmail.com
 
~
 
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-spiritually-f-cked-podcast/id1829193477
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships

"Sorry can't get to the phone right now I'm at Joe Dispenza..."
In this epi Taylor shares how she found her way into daddy Joe Dispenza’s work and how it became one of the catalysts that changed her life. She spills the low down on attending three of his retreats, what actually happens in the rooms people love to speculate about, and how his teachings around coherence, meditation, and commitment reshaped her entire relationship to living life.
We explore what it really means to take responsibility for your inner state, how the body responds when the mind changes (embodiment helloooo), and why consistency—not bypassing—is the work. 
Call it a cult? We call it devotion... And we want to be apart of this cult.
This isn’t a sales pitch or blind praise. It’s a firsthand reflection on learning how to heal yourself, meet your edge, and stay committed to that higher frequency. Because no one is coming to save you - so you better buckle up and take ownership of your life.
Taylor also gives a mini update on her life: what's brewing for her in the next few months and the intentions she's stepping into. (You don't want to miss this).
 
~
 
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-spiritually-f-cked-podcast/id1829193477
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships

"Our body speaks the needs the soul is too shy to ask" - Taylor Mulholland
Early menopause anyone???
In this episode, Taylor shares the full story behind her experience with premature ovarian failure — from the early signs of cycle irregularity, the detrimental side effects of birth control, and the frustration of searching for answers within Western medicine, to the injury that sent her into a profound dark night of the soul (or many nights of the soul...lol).
Taylor talks openly about the experience with hormone replacement therapy, what it provided for her, and where it fell short — and how slowly weaning off that industry's way of "healing" guided her toward a deeper, more holistic path of living. This includes nervous system regulation, trauma work, herbalism, spirit doctoring, and the teachings that reshaped Taylor's entire relationship with her body/mind/spirit, including the work of Joe Dispenza and Kim Anami.
This episode is not medical advice or a prescription. It is one woman’s lived experience — and an invitation to see your cycle and experiences not as something to control or fix, but as a language your body uses to communicate.
If you’ve ever felt redirected by your body, dismissed by systems, or disconnected from your feminine center, this conversation is for you.
"Today, I have a healthy, regular cycle — but more importantly, I have trust, safety, and an intimate relationship with my womb that I never had before." - Taylor
WE ADORE YOU! AND YOUR WOMB!
 
~
 
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-spiritually-f-cked-podcast/id1829193477
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships
 

MILF of the hour! Man, I Love Frogs…
In this episode, Taylor shares her Kambo experience — how she was first guided to the medicine, what brought it to her psyche, and how her relationship with it evolved over time.
What began as a search for physical healing (specifically around acne) quickly revealed itself to be something much deeper. We talk about how this experience felt divinely guided, what the medicine began to heal beyond the physical, and how it met Taylor in ways she didn’t expect.
We explore who Kambo may be right for — and why it’s not for everyone. Taylor speaks honestly about the intensity of the medicine, the importance of discernment, and why curiosity is potent medicine in itself.
Taylor also gauges what ceremonies can look like, grounded insight on Kambo responsibility/integrity and the responsibility that comes with working with such a powerful medicine. This conversation is rooted in respect, humility, and right relationship — not instruction or persuasion.
This episode is shared as reflection, not recommendation — an honest account of medicine, discernment, and the path from experience into responsibility.
Final note - listening to the body’s wisdom above all else.
WE ADORE YOU! AND FROGS TOO!!
 
Mentioned: Spiritual Guide to Acne: https://sadflowerswritten.com/products/the-spiritual-guide-to-acne-mini-course
 
~
 
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-spiritually-f-cked-podcast/id1829193477
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships

Originally: The spiritual truths I’m afraid to say out loud…
“This episode was recorded, deleted and eventually revisited — not because the truth changed, but because I did.” - Taylor
In this conversation, Taylor shares why she originally took this episode down, what felt misaligned at the time and full circles to what feels more resonate now. Rather than calling anything out, Taylor’s offering reflection — on her own growth, own blind spots and ways spirituality can both support and complicate your path. ~ so many blurred lines ~
We explore topics that are often spoken about in extremes — religion, twin flames, plant medicine, ego, government narratives and the infamous ‘spiritual performers’ — not as proclamations, but as lived experiences that ask us to slow down, soften and take responsibility for our own discernment.
This isn’t about right or wrong ways to be "spiritual" — It’s about noticing when language outpaces true embodiment, and that soul growth isn’t always linear… nor performative.
Let this epi be a permission slip — to be honest about where you are, to stay curious and to trust that evolving doesn’t require erasing your humanity. Because maybe the spiritual path isn’t about transcending the human experience... But learning how to stay.
And that being a good human matters more than sounding enlightened...
“It’s all an experience… Here is mine.” 
XOXO, Taylor 
ENJOY! 
~
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-spiritually-f-cked-podcast/id1829193477
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships
 

A love note for returning to self... 
This episode is a personal life update and reflection on the final stretch of 2025.
Taylor shares where she's currently at, the lessons 2025 brought forward and the ones that didn’t just land intellectually, but were fully lived and integrated.
She reflects on the themes like alchemy, returning to nature / our life's natural rhythm and calling out the BS in the distractions and noise that we consume ourselves with. No spiritual bypassing in this one!
This epi is both a closing and a clearing — an opportunity to honor what has been, release the stories that no longer needs and make space for what’s next.
What is Taylor consciously embodying in the new year? Take a listen to find out. 
If you’re moving through a season of transition, endings, or quiet reorientation, this conversation is for you.
We’re all here to walk each other home... 
~
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships

In this intimate 1:1 session, Taylor sits down with her dear friend and space holder, Shay Rays. What begins as a heartfelt conversation unfolds into a profound exploration of the subconscious—revealing hidden layers, emotional truths and a powerful breakthrough moment. 
Together, they explore embodiment, awareness and the courage it takes to meet yourself fully.
If you’re on a journey of self-discovery or ready to uncover deeper parts of who you are, this episode invites you into the transformative power of being truly seen, heard, and held.
"I would highly recommend booking a 1:1 session with Shay Rays if you’re ready to uncover deeper layers of yourself and fully embody who you are. She holds such a safe, loving space for transformation." - Taylor
 
Work with Shay Rays: 
Shay Rays website: https://raysofshay.com
Shay Rays substack: https://substack.com/@shayrays 
Shay Rays youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@shay_rays
~ 
Connects!
instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespirituallyfckedpodcast/
https://www.instagram.com/taylormvlholland/
youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSpirituallyFckedPodcast
tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@maylorgangordie
website: https://sadflowerswritten.com
substack - https://substack.com/@sadflowerswritten 
Intuitive Guided Mentorship with me - https://sadflowerswritten.com/blogs/news/intuitive-guided-mentorships